Peter Rabbit

As good a justification for the creation and existence of myxomatosis as you’ll find – even more so than Bing, which at least has a modicum of charm on its side – as this abominable incarnation of Beatrix Potter’s beloved woodland friends undoubtedly prompts her to turn in her grave. Formulaic plots, one-dimensional characterisations, stupid catch-phrases, additional populist characters of no merit, this really does have it all. “Rabbits are brave, rabbits are brave,” Peter chants, whilst making the inevitable escape from Mr Tod’s cooking pot. No, Peter, rabbits are vermin – and evidently with the memories and attention spans of goldfish given the repetitive predicaments – and, as smart-arse Lily says at least once per episode with clockwork reliability, “I know that for a fact.” — David

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